I was raised staring at my dad working on and with a Commodore 64.
Sweet memories of a tiny little curious kid sitting on his lap for hours and hours.
Besides being close to him, I only wanted to know how drawings of small drawers could be moved inside a magic box.
I remember fights with my brother and my cousin few years later for whose turn to play Pacman was. Those balls looking like my favourite yellow crisps are still as familiar as the sound of the Tetris jingle.
I was a couple of years old and a bit more and the 90’s were stepping in a busy Italy holding the FIFA world cup.
These were the years when hairstyles and shoulder pads could not go unnoticed.
I remember crazy Spice girls songs and clothes put together with a meaningful Kurt Cobain.
A walkman, a pair of headphones and a million tapes which were always getting stuck on the best moment of the song as some of my best mates.
The truth is – I could spend hours talking about all the small things I remember about those years. When I was growing up and how technology was slowly entering into my life.
These are the most vivid and meaningful pictures I carry inside myself because there is a special innocence in them, given by the age I was still in.
Back to nowadays, exactly last month and during my last trip, I lost my phone. Not really a news for me as it did happen few times in the past.
Last month though, for the first time in my life, it did not turn into a subtle tragedy.
This time I did not rush to the shop for getting a substitute and the fact that where I was there wasn’t a phone shop did not determine my choice.
I did not feel the urge to log on Facebook so that all my friends would have been able to know why their whatsApp messages were looking like unreceived.
That morning, when I woke up and realized my smartphone was not in my purse, I tried to fight my destiny only with one trial.
I visited the last two places where I remember I happened to be the night before.
One was a bar and the second place was the closest beach to this same bar.
Skipping the first option which was unfruitful, the only thing I found on the rocks was part of my underwear.
I had a night swim under the moonlight.
That morning it was about 33 degrees and the waves were so silent that I could have pretended I was part of a painting.
I grabbed my underwear and smiled because suddenly I heard a click in my mind.
Yes, I want to fully experience things like this in my days.
I want to treasure real memories.
Since I don’t have a smartphone if happens I am doing nothing, I just enjoy doing nothing.
I can go back to myself.
If my friends need to call me, they can call my number.
They can text my number. Traditional messages where you don’t have to see whether that one has read or not your words.
I guess also dating will be easier. If someone is truly interested in you, he can just call and show some appreciation.
If someone wants to find you, that someone can still find you.
I love the feeling of calling a friend to talk about our evening plans, hearing the voice.
Feeling the excitement or that unique tone which can say more than a cold, always-the-same-looking text.
Since I don’t have a smartphone and I see everyone crazily tapping, scrolling, swiping right or left on that screen, I smile more.
I know that I can lift my head, look up at the sky and feel much more alive than before.
And all this – it makes me think of that tiny little girl I was.
Maybe if I was ten years younger, I could have never thought of living like this.
Because if your birth certificate was issued in 1984, you may still be free of freeing yourself from some unnecessary technology.
That magic box, hiding so many small drawers, it used to make me wonder for hours about the wizard which was beyond it.
But despite all the sparkling tricks I saw when I was that tiny kid, the moon was always my favourite magic.
More than that box full of surprises. More than any kind of other toys.
My first poem is still there after all, into those yellow pages inspired by a summer full moon night and written in a rush with an erasable paper mate blue pen while no one was looking at me. It was the year 1991.
It makes me so happy to see and know that for me it is still like that today.
Because I don’t believe in those kind of wizards anymore but if I free the kid inside myself, it is then when I still believe in magic.